Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Wagons and such

I've fallen off...and they've moved on...I'm waiting for the next.
Take your pick, you name which "wagon" it is and I feel like I am just watching drive off into the sunset!  Health, Exercise...blogging.

I apologize for my lack of responsibility.  If I'm going to have a blog, I need to keep it up.  If any of you are still out there. Thanks.

So, as I climb back onto the rickety car and rejoin the wagon train, I will try and be concise and fluid as I share where I am.

I am at a place that if not careful, I could stay forever.  A place that I think has gotten many people in trouble, if not handled correctly.  A place of Abiding.  As in, when the branches are being pruned, they abide in the vine.  It is blissful, restful, beautiful...it's full.  I wonder, and understand the struggle, how the Israelites returned to work after taking every 7th year off.  Although, with my personality, I guess I will be itching to get back at it.  But for now, I'm enjoying my Sabbath.

The other morning in my place of meeting (sounds important, it's my new hammock out back, I'm a creature that loves ceremony) I had the strangest experience.  I was reading my Bible, and the spirit told me no..."ok, so not that passage, I'll read the next".  no. Put it down.  Seriously, put down the thing that I am trying so hard to instill back into my daily life?  But it was clear as day, almost audible.  "Stop trying to learn me and just BE with me.  I'm relational, I love you, I'll tell you all you want to know."  I was shocked, excited and humbled.  I go about life, trying to learn, I'm a Berean at heart. Those are great things, and part of what makes me, well, me.  But during this season, God has really showed me that I can't do ANYTHING while abiding.  That's the whole point.  (and yes, I do still pick up my Bible each morning, but for different reasons)
It's hard, but in the midst of pruning, a love like no other time shows through.  A protection and trust is shown while all the things that have become dead and fruitless are cut away. 

I've also learned that in the pruning time, if you try and produce fruit...it will whither away...rather quickly.  I'm not meant to produce anything at this time...such revolutionary thinking in this American-Christian society.

So, my posts may be rather bland, one sided and well...less "Courtney"...but what my prayer that you see now, is My Love.  He is who should shine through, for you see, there is not much of me now, I'm being pruned.

Peace be with you.

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