Monday, September 14, 2009

Lemons and Lemonade

So life has handed us some lemons. Some being "hand-picked", others just put into our basket. So we are left, making decisions that leave our children crying at times (don't worry, nothing life shattering, just evaluating needs and wants) some leaving me crying(Lemon's usually do that to people), and all requiring a lot of Trust. Yeah, the BIG issue of my life. But I am getting clarity on it.

I truly know and believe that I trust in my God. But, do I trust myself? Do I trust that I am making the best decisions, or is David making the best decisions for our family? Not really. Do I trust that I/we won't mess things up big time? Not really. Do I trust that I am worthy of being called out of the boat? Now we are getting somewhere.

I wrote a post on this about a year ago, but God is pushing it in front of my face. Chris Brooks (because I am not permitted to call him Brooks!) did a talk some time ago about Peter getting out of the boat and walking on the water. It is clearly stated that he began to sink because of doubt, but doubt in who? Jesus called him out on the water and love able Peter went without thinking it through (at Wayfarer we like to call that "Go before Know") That is why we love him, reckless abandon. But as he began to think, or hear lies, he began to doubt. Did he doubt that Jesus could keep him afloat, or did he doubt in his worthiness to be called out of the boat for such an amazing task?
I have heard it said A LOT about Peter taking his eyes of Jesus and just keep our eyes on Him and we will not sink (which I don't think is necessarily correct) but what hits me about it, is that Jesus didn't let him sink. He BEGAN to sink, but Jesus grabbed his hand pulled him up and tossed him in the boat.
It's a partnership, I have a part in it and for me to be effective, I need to find that "part" (which I have) and believe that I am worthy, as worthy as everyone else, to act that out. And when I begin to sink because of doubt, which I will, He'll pull me up, toss me in the boat for a bit, and call me back out again. Why, because He is good and He has faith in me and He loves me when I can't look Him in the face.

So Lemonade...I don't know, maybe a Lemon Pie or Garlic Lemon Pasta, but we'll do something with these lemons. and it will be great...


  1. court, i love your blogs!!! you always inspire me. your perspective is always the breath of fresh air i need. xoxo